In the beginning, there are lots of bumps as you figure out life as a married couple, but I’ve always felt like a lot can be learned from newlyweds. While some call it “the honeymoon phase,” every couple can benefit from going back to the very foundation they built their marriage on.
Jacob and I have been married for 3 years and already I can feel myself letting the stress of adult life sneak in, and the focus on my marriage slip away. With bills, work, a toddler, and the uncertainty of Army life its easy to relax your standards and drift into auto-pilot.
So, I’m going back to our roots.
Here are 5 ways you can start loving like newlyweds.
Do Little Things
When we were first married, Jacob and I joke that I was “super wife.” I would get up at 4 am to make him a big breakfast before PT, pack him lunches, leave little love notes for him to find. After having Addison, I basically threw all that out the window. Doing little things in the beginning was my way of showing him I loved him and wanted to take care of him and, yes, be super wife. While I won’t be making 4 am omelets again anytime soon, I have definitely made more of an effort to make hot breakfasts and leave sweet notes for my honey during the work week.
Have Date Nights
When you are a newlywed you may not necessarily need date nights, but they are a great excuse to go out with your new husband. Now we need to actually PLAN date nights and stick to them. In this area we do a pretty good job. I love to eat and I love my husband. There is something so great about seeing my husband as the hottie I married, and not the guy I turn to for diaper duty. Also, I get to eat my meal while its still hot. It’s a win/win.
Be Super Communicators
In the beginning, I’d like to think all couples really focus on awesome communication. You certainly don’t want to kick off your marriage bickering or fighting. Maybe it’s just me, but I’m a bit of a brat and totally the confrontational one in our relationship. I literally married a saint who does. not. yell. so I’m trying to be better about picking my battles, speaking calmly, and not berating my husband over silly things like leaving the dryer door open. (but seriously, it’s so annoying!)
Laugh A Lot
This one is easy! All you have to do is take a chill pill and relaxxxxx. I’ll be honest, this can be challenging if you have a tendency to be easily frustrated or annoyed. Newlyweds are great at this because life is sweet, you’re in love, and your husband is the best thing since sliced bread. After a few years of marriage, they maybe have learned that those cute little quirks have become slightly annoying and life isn’t as fun and carefree as they originally thought. Here is where I learned that I do annoying things too and I need to quit being so intense. I need to laugh with my husband and lighten up. Quit sweating the small stuff.
Put Your Husband First
Stick with me here for a second. Imagine if all you ever did was put your husband first, all the time. Imagine if he did the same thing. Both of your would be happy and have your needs met while simultaneously making your spouse feel loved and cared for. Newlyweds do this without trying, but eventually that whole selfish mentality sneaks back in. It’s not your fault, its just how we are as humans. This one is the most challenging, but the most rewarding. I wouldn’t say I am perfect at putting my husband first, by any means, but I work at it daily and it definitely keeps both of us happier and more in love than even our newlywed days.
How do you love like newlyweds??